As a female leader, you need to be able to trust yourself before you can lead others. If you're constantly doubting your own abilities, it's going to be difficult to inspire confidence in those who follow you. So how can you build self trust?
One of the best ways to build self trust is to surround yourself with people who lift you up rather than those who bring you down. When you're constantly surrounded by people who tell you your goals are crazy or that you're not good enough, it's tough to maintain self trust. But when you surround yourself with people who believe in you and support your dreams, it's much easier to stay confident in yourself, even when times are tough.
Find a group of supportive friends or colleagues who will champion your goals and ambitions, and make sure to distance yourself from those who are constantly questioning you (and in turn, making you question yourself). If you're surrounding yourself with people who are constantly doubting you... you will inevitably learn to doubt yourself.
Practicing self compassion, self care, and giving yourself grace are also key to building self trust. This means being gentle with yourself when things don't go as planned. When you're kind to yourself and take care of yourself, it's easier to believe that you're capable of handling whatever comes your way.
Female leaders are naturally "on top of it" all the time. You likely get anxious when you aren't in control, or when you feel like you don't know the right answer or the right decision to make. Recognize that even though you might not have all the answers all the time, you can handle it - no matter what.
Trusting yourself means respecting yourself. Showing yourself the same respect that you show others is also crucial - respect your own thoughts and opinions in the same way you would respect the thoughts and opinions of others - this includes listening to your gut instinct!
Cut yourself some slack if you don't have all the answers. It's okay to not know everything - what matters is how you handle it when things get tough. When things get overwhelming, take a step back and breathe. And remind yourself that everyone makes mistakes - including you. But just like you've gotten through every obstacle life has thrown at you so far... you will get through this one and the next one (several) as well.
Setting boundaries is an important part of maintaining self trust. When you allow others to walk all over you or take advantage of your kindness, it chips away at your energy and gives you little time to spend with yourself.
Spending time with YOU is one of the best ways to get to now who you really are and what's important to you. Getting to know the real you is mission critical in building self trust. Because just as you wouldn't trust a stranger off the street... you can't trust yourself if you don't know who you are.
Make sure you're setting boundaries with others - both in your personal life and in your professional life. This will help protect your energy levels and allow you get to know the person you really are. Allow yourself space to stay in alignment with and focus on what's really important to YOU.
If you find yourself stuck or questioning your abilities, it's time to start building trust in yourself. You've done amazing things in this life - and you are capable of so much more. If you're finding yourself stuck, start surrounding yourself with people who believe in you (like the amazing women inside Be in the Room). Make sure you are practicing self care, setting boundaries, and respecting your own thoughts and opinions. This will allow you to build the foundation of trust that will help carry you through both the good times and the bad.
Trust yourself - you are an amazing human who can do incredible things.